A Grief Shared across the Blogosphere

Over the last year I have come to know about a precious young boy called Daniel through the blog of another Irishwoman, Tric, from My Thoughts on a Page.

Daniel died, aged 12, a year ago today from Leukemia. Tric, who is a very close friend of Daniel’s family, has written extensively about Daniel’s dynamic personality and the awful grief that has been associated with his passing.

I didn’t know until recently that Daniel had died on November 29th. This is a day that has huge significance in our family, too,  as it marks the anniversary of my eldest nephew who died tragically, aged 24, on November 29th, 1996. While that may seem like many years ago, it feels no time as he still lives on in all our hearts.

I promised Tric that I would cast a special stone into the sea in Daniel’s memory on this day of days.

It’s been a day on which the sun never appeared but Garrarus Beach was waiting patiently for me as I headed out for my swim in the late afternoon.

Walking along the sand, I thought of how a young boy of twelve would more than likely be drawn to the rocks and the sand. I decided to build a sandcastle for Daniel, wishing that he and my very artistic nephew were there with me to design it properly.

D1

Two beautiful stones ~ one bigger and one smaller ~ begged to be chosen from the thousands that carpetted the shoreline.

D2

I gave each of them a little kiss before casting them into the gentle sea and somehow it felt like these two young men, who are so sorely missed, have now been brought together through the power of writing.

Garrarus Beach, Co. Waterford
Garrarus Beach, Co. Waterford

There’s no easy way to lose someone you love but today’s experience made me feel more than ever that a grief shared is definitely more easily borne than one which remains knotted in the depths of the heart.

 

 

Author: socialbridge

I am a sociologist and writer from Ireland. I have worked as a social researcher for 30 years and have had a lifelong passion for writing. My main research interests relate to health care and I love to write both non-fiction and poetry.

17 thoughts on “A Grief Shared across the Blogosphere”

  1. Thanks so much for this beautiful post. It made a world of difference to me, and I shared it with Daniels family who were stunned and delighted to be thought of by someone they do not know. I too think they will find each other, especially since they were cast into the sea together, and I lit a candle for each of them. Anniversaries are difficult, no matter how many years pass. Once again condolences on your very sad loss.

    1. Thanks very much Tric for your kind words and actions and please send lots of love from me to Daniel’s family. Every day is an anniversary of some kind when one has lost one so precious.

  2. You are so right about every day being an anniversary of some kind of loss. I’m working today on thinking of that in a positive way, that some are anniversaries-to-be, of good things and people who are yet to come.

    1. Sandy, that an interesting take on this point. It can be very, confusing, I find when the same date and, even day,
      marks both a very positive and a very negative anniversary . For example, August Bank Holiday weekend is one which brings together the such highs and lows in my life, it is pretty unbelievable and whatever anyone might say, it’s pretty difficult to just forget all that and ‘live entirely in the present’ as I believe that our ‘present’ is in many ways a product of our past.
      I’d love if you could elaborate on what way your mind is working on this one.

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