I was out collecting chestnuts yesterday, as part of my fun role in seeking to market hubby’s carpet business, and had that incredibly evocative feel of walking through crackling, Autumnal leaves as I gathered my loot.
Last night, I went from thinking about the feel of textures underfoot ~ shells, warm sand, dewy grass, ~ to a different kind of soul.
It was the image of a roadside billboard that was on the road just as one swung across the bridge in Waterford towards Dublin and it was there for years and years as I made that journey regularly.
This would get me every single time and have me thinking until I reached Kilkenny, an hour’s drive back then!
It springs into my mind on a regular basis still but there is one turning point in my young life when it really hit me.
I had just finished College and went to sit the Civil Service Exams in search of a permanent pensionable post. There were hundreds of other people there all beavering away answering the exam questions.
Instead of focussing on answering the questions, I started to analyse them and after about twenty minutes quietly packed my bag and left the exam hall.
It felt all wrong. It just wasn’t me. I felt that while I might well get a job that it wouldn’t be one in which I could realise my dreams or express myself in the way that I wanted.
To this day, I wonder about that decision. I could certainly be doing with the pension but I feel that I was right to be true to myself and embark on what turned out to be a very precarious career.
Even though the sign is long gone from that place just beyond Sallypark, it resides in my consciousness and comes to the fore when I least expect.
I must confess that I knowingly sold my soul once and I found it excruciatingly difficult and ended up spending years trying to redeem it!
Do you have these sorts of soul qualms or do you share the happier ones of massaging your soles on the soft carpets of life?